On bad ideas

1) Penn State's College Republicans student group apparently believed that the best way to engender reasoned debate about the question of illegal immigration is to have some of their members dress up in orange shirts, representing illegal immigrants, and then have the rest of their members chase the "illegals" around in the role of la migra. A pithy quote from Penn State President Graham Spanier:

Spanier labeled the original idea "unproductive and offensive."

Are the masses satisfied? They are not.

"You have to be creative to get students to listen to you," sophomore Chuck Knight wrote in a letter to the editor published recently in the student newspaper, The Daily Collegian. "For that matter, you have to be creative anytime you are trying to raise concern about something."

An official with the College Republicans seemed at a loss yesterday to understand the continuing outrage as he stood within earshot of speakers who decried his group as discriminatory and insensitive.

"They're against something that no longer exists," said Seth Bender, 20, chairman of the group and a sophomore from Lebanon. "I think they're just misinformed."

If that something that no longer exists is a cavalier attitude towards serious problems confronting America today that borders on the offensive, I'm pretty sure it still exists. Again, I note that Seth Bender has gone on the record himself--sloppy play, College Republicans! I reiterate, better to send a fall-guy freshman spokesperson. Of course, I should talk, posting on a blog, but there it is.

2) Generally, I'm for defense spending on more gadgetry. Robots, mine finding dolphins, R/C controlled tigers, I am all in favor of more of that. However, I'm afraid I draw the line at combat skateboards.

That's just over the line. Unless, of course, we go to war in a country composed entirely of half-pipes, in which case I admit that the combat skateboard would be extremely useful. Americans would probably have an advantage in that kind of combat, too. Tony Hawk would be drafted as an instructor.

In fact, I take it back. We should buy thousands of these boards, and build strategic skate parks in rogue nations around the globe. Then, when the terrorists rolled in, we would Gleam their Cube. You know what I'm talking about. Sk8 or die!